The Essence of Happiness

Now sometimes people confuse happiness with pleasure... from my point of view, the highest happiness is when one reaches the stage of Liberation, at which there is no more suffering. That’s genuine, lasting happiness. True happiness relates more to the mind and heart. Happiness that depends mainly on physical pleasure is unstable; one day it’s there, the next day it may not be.

One interesting thing about GREED is that although the underlying motive is to seek satisfaction, the irony is that even after obtaining the object of your desire, you are still not satisfied.. The true antidote of greed is contentment. If you have a strong sense of contentment, it doesn’t matter whether you obtain the object or note; either way, you are still content.

Whether our action is wholesome or unwholesome depends on whether that action or deed arises from a disciplined or undisciplined state of mind. It is felt that a disciplined mind leads to happiness and an undisciplined mind leads to suffering, and in fact it is said that bringing about discipline within one’s mind is the essence of the Buddha’s teaching.

(The Essence of Happiness – Dali Lama – From “A Guidebook for Living)

GET GOOD AT ASKING

"He who asks may be a fool for five minutes. He who doesn’t is a fool for a lifetime,” goes the wise Chinese’s proverb. It makes me think I an ad I read in the classifieds recently that said, “To the beautiful woman in the brown suede coat at the chemist at xyz on Saturday, November 28 @ 4pm. You bumped into me in front of the magazine section. I would love to meet and chat”. The man who placed this ad then left his phone number. Destiny had given him an opportunity – possibly to meet the woman of this dreams – and he had squandered it. And now, after regretting the fact that he “did not ask” he has had to resort to placing an ad in the newspaper in the desperate hop of finding this woman.

The more you ask, the more you get, but it takes practice to get good at it. Success is a numbers game. As the Buddhist sages observed, “Every arrow that hits the bull’s eye is the result of one hundred misses”. Over the coming weeks, flex your “asking muscles” by asking for a better table at your favourite restaurant, for a free second scoop at your local ice-cream shop, or for a complimentary upgrade on your next airline flight. You might be surprised at the abundance that will flow into your life when you just ask sincerely for the things you want.

Remember, the person who asks for what he wants at least has a chance of getting what he wants. The person who does not ask has no chance. “It’s a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it”.

By Robin Sharma (Who Will Cry When You die?)

MASTER YOUR TIME

MASTER YOUR TIME
I have always found it ironic that so many people say they would do anything for a little more time every day, and yet they squander the time they already have. Time is life's great leveller; we all have the same allotment of 24 hours in a day. What separates the people who created great lives form the also- rans is how they use these hours.

Most of us live as if we have an infinite amount of time to do all the things we know we must do to live a full and rewarding life. And so we procrastinate and put the achievement of our dreams on hold while we tend to those daily emergencies that fill up our days. This is a certain recipe for life regret. As novelist Paul Bowles once wrote:

.......because we don't know (when we will die), we get to think of life as an inexhaustive well. Yet everything happens only a certain number of times, and a very small number, really. How many more times will you remember a certain afternoon of your childhood, some afternoon that's so deeply a part of your being that you can't even conceive of your life without it? Perhaps four or five times more. Perhaps not even that. How many more times will you remember a certain afternoon of your childhood, some afternoon that's so deeply a part of your being that you can't even conceive of your life without it? Perhaps four or five times more? Perhaps not even that. How many more times will you watch the full moon rise? Perhaps twenty. And yet it all seems limitless.

Commit yourself to managing your time more effectively. Develop a keen sense of awareness about how important your time really is. Don’t let people waste this most precious of commodities, and invest it only in those activities that truly count.

GET BEHIND PEOPLES EYEBALLS

One of the deepest of all the human hungers is the need to be understood, cherished, and honoured. Yet in the fast paced days we live in, too many people believe that listening involves nothing more than waiting for the other person to stop talking. And to make matters worse, while that person is speaking, we are all too often using that time to formulate our own response, rather than empathizing with the point being made.

Taking the time to truly understand another’s point of view shows that you value what he has to say and care about him as a person. When you start "getting behind the eyes balls; of the person how is speaking and try to see the world form his perspective, you will connect with him deeply and build high trust relationships that last.

We have two ears a done mouth for a reason: to listen twice as much as we speak. And having the courtesy to be a better listener has another advantage: Since you are not doing all the talking, you are doing all the learning, gaining access to information you would have missed had you been engaged in the usual monologue. Here are a few practical tips to become better at the art of listening:

1. If you are speaking and the person you are having a conversation with has not said something within the past 60 seconds, there is a good chance you have lost her and it’s time to stop talking so much.

2. Resist the temptation to interrupt. Catch yourself just before you do so and pay more attention to the content of what the other person is saying to you.

3. After the other person makes her points, rather than immediately responding with your opinion, reflect on what you have just heard. Saying something such as, Just to make sure I understand you, are you saying.....?" And doing so with complete sincerity will bring you much closer to the people you interact with every day of your life.

(Who will cry when you die - Robin Sharma)

The Poem I wrote when Dad Died

FARWELL DAD

(My Dad – Jan Jantzen)

My father was a Master Chef and worked into his prime
He worked hard everyday and night and he was always on time
He walked to work in weather both foul and both fair
He worked long into his fulfilled life until he had white hair

My dad would stand all day and night in front of a hot flaming stove
With pots and pans and food galore,
Thrown around a creation was wove

Bellows could be heard by dad from the kitchen far and near
“Get out of my bloody kitchen – Can’t you see I’m in top gear”?
Flames from the stove produced beads of sweat
But not once did he ever voice any regrets

Into his pan he would create his famous master piece
Then add a bit of this and that which went down like a treat
Then on the plate he would then create this unbelievable dish
This man-made creation right from his hand
Revealed creations so so lavish

He made meals for the public to line up to eat
And every night for us, this was a treat
He also made meals for his family – 3 meal courses
He made meals for all our childhood friends
He made meals that could feed 100 horses

My father raised 2 kids
He shaped them too as the food he did
He moulded them to be generous and kind
Tempered by his love and by his design

He instilled in them a sense of right and wrong
He prepared them for the life ahead and to be strong
He gave to each of them whatever it was that he had
And made them proud that he was their dad

My father worked until the night he fell asleep
And then silence engulfed our little Yamba town - we all wept
The banging and crashing we all got to know so well
Had stopped inside his kitchen
But since I am my father’s daughter, time will only tell!

Give 'em a hug, a great big kiss.
Because one day, he will be greatly missed.

Now I will have to look up at the stars and
say, "I love you, Daddy, more and more each day
For if you keep these moments, you will never be apart
And my daddy will live forever locked safe within my heart.


By Jessica Jantzen

Favourite Websites

Your Wish Is Granted DVDs
http://www.yourwishisgranted.com.au

Twig the Fairy
http://www.twigthefairy.com/
http://www.facebook.com/#!/twigthefairy

Zinnia the Fairy
www.facebook.com/zinniathefairy

Dr. Wayne. W. Dyer
http://www.drwaynedyer.com
http://www.facebook.com/#!/drwaynedyer

Louise L. Hay
http://www.louisehay.com
http://www.facebook.com/#!/louiselhay

The Secret
http://www.thesecret.tv/

Doreen Virtue
http://www.angeltherapy.com/

Allison Dubois
http://www.allisondubois.com/


The Tao Bums
http://www.thetaobums.com/

Gold Coast City Parks and EVERY ACTIVITY
http://www.gcparks.com.au/social-gatherings.aspx

Books I Love to Read

Excuses Begone! Dr. Wayne. W.Dyer

Change Your Thought Change Your Life - Dr. Wayne. W.Dyer

Inspiration - Dr. Wayne. W.Dyer

10 Secrets for Success and Inner Peace - Dr. Wayne. W.Dyer

Chicken Soup for the Soul - Jack Canfield & Mark V Hansen

Who will Cry when you Die - Robin Sharma

The Three Keys to Self-Empowerment - Stuart Wilde

The Secret - Rhonda Byrne

The Power of I AM - Johna Maxwell Taylor

You Can Heal Your Life - Louise L. Hay

The Chemical Maze Shopping Companion - Bill Statham

The Essence of Happiness - The Dalai Lama & Howard C Cutler

Ask your Guides Connecting to Your Divine Support System - Sonia Choquette

How to DevelopYour Sixth Sense - David Lawson

Calm Kids - Massage Stories for Children by Tricia Riordan

Peek into the beginning of my life

I was born at Grafton Base Hospital, NSW Australia. Jessica Alexandra Anne Janczar-Jantzen. I was the first for Anne & Jan Jantzen. My mother and father met, while my father was working as a chef on Hayman Island and my mother a waitress on the same island. I remember my mother showing me this beautiful black & White photo of her in a grass skirt which was her uniform and such a happy smile.

18 months down the track my mother gave birth to a baby girl to be my sister named Rebecca Jan. I don’t remember anything about her birth or coming home as I obviously to was young. I do remember any how the times we played. We grew up on Roberts Creek Brushgrove while dad was farming and mum looked after us. But soon dad was to start work as a chef again.

My father Jan Edward Jantzen was a Master Chef and trained in Switzerland, Vienna and worked in many restaurants overseas. Dad was born in Poland – Biala Beilsko. Dad worked in Sydney alongside my godfather Alex (also Polish) at the ‘Summit’ – Australia’s first revolving restaurant. (my godfather Alex sadly passed away while I was in England in 1997 while travelling in England and was going to see me. I did attend his funeral in England though and dad was very very glad that I did. Alex was his best friend). Dad also worked at the Cebel Town House and the Chelsea in Kings Cross Sydney. Dad would tell me the story about how has a waiter the guy who played Dracula in the movies back then was in the restaurant & he saw him drop a large amount of cash on the floor. Dad picked it up and gave it back to him and this guy told dad that he should have kept it! I don’t know why I was told this story, I forget.


Dad & mum use to drive myself and my sister to Sydney on trips in a big blue ford car when I around 7/8 years of age. My sister asleep across on the back seat and me on a make shift seat behind the two front seats so we could sleep on these long trips. I remember looking out the car window and letting my eyes catch everything in site. Mum had this smelly stuff that she would put under our noses if we were feeling car sick, and it was around the New Castle area that mum decided to stick this under my nose, Oh my god! I can still smell it today. It did work thou.

I remember all the big lights and houses in Sydney. We would stay at my god mothers house, her name was Alexandra. That’s were my middle name came from. I still remember having a skipping ropes and I would go outside and skip on the footpath. There was a little tree I would climb up into and hand the rope from and just basically play. The neighbor did not like this at all & I left my skipping rope out in the tree and when I went to get it, he had taken it! I knew he took it & never told mum as I would have gotten in trouble. I still remember my rope to this day!

We would site see around Sydney and when visiting the Kings Cross District I remember Mum & Dad playing a little trick on us. When we were wandering off they would hide in a shop and then when we realized they were gone, I would panic and start crying. They then would come and give us a lecture about what happens if you go off and get lost? “Stay with us” they would say… To this day I could stand in the exact spot I was crying. And I was only 8 then!

Back home on the farm we had our horses named: Tango (mums horse), Texas (dads), Tiffany (Becks) Misty (mine). There was also Rajah who never really got used. Then we had our cattle dogs Sparky and Spikle. Sparky was the vicious one and never really liked strangers. We had a lassie dog called Sandy and Toppa which Nan had the brother to that dog out on her farm. Then along the way our lassie dog was running next to the car just passed the mailbox and at the first corner she collapsed. I still remember watching her next to the car and then she just fell. She died! I still must find out why? she hadToppa also died of old age I think. We buried Toppa in the paddock diagonally from the farm house that was a sad moment.

We use to go to the Brushgrove hotel also for lunch and one day when I came home from school walking down our dirt road as usual we arrived home and there was this puppy dog, a Springer Spaniel. Dad had saved it from drowning as the owners had to many puppies. But is this true? Another thing to find out. Anyways, we were trying to name it and first there was Scotch, then Whiskey, then we settled on Brandy. So Brandy was our in house pet. I remember one day mum shoeing us in the bathroom with Brandy as someone came to our door! Then mum said it was ok to come out. Mmmmm, still don’t know why…..

About MissYamba

It’s always nice to hear a little about the person running a website so here I go...

My name is Jessica; I’m 40 with a daughter who is will be four at the end of June named Kobi, my partner Paul and the family dog Johna. Just like any other ordinary, crazy family out there we have our ups and downs but too really listen to others and hear them clearly is what I love to do... I, like all mums get yelled at on the 5th attempt at telling the hubby or children something, but at the end of the day, you must remember you did your best, you’re a beautiful person and there is always tomorrow!

"GREAT ARE THEY WHO SEE THAT SPIRITUAL IS STONGER THAN ANY MATERIAL FORCE THAT THOUGHTS RULE THE WORLD"

~Ralph Waldo Emerson~

My Journey From Spirit

For those friends who know me really well are aware that I am a FREE SPIRITED person. The spiritual journey often begins from humble origins, and nobody can predict where the path with take you, who you’ll encounter, or the place you’ll end up.

I have always had you could say a 6th sense, always an inclination, that feeling that I knew what was going on before the situation ever really arose or I get those Goosebumps that speak to me.

Without any formal path, practice or teacher here are a few of my experiences:

At the age of seven I remember going to my parents wedding and telling mum and dad about this. I wasn't even born when they were married. This played on my mind for years and years to come. I can still tell you accurately the church the fence, it was country, not a lot of people and a donkey that was nearby. As I became older I approached mum and dad again about this and viewed their wedding albums. And there, right in front of me was the proof that I had attended their wedding even though I was not born!

At the age of eight I remember like it was yesterday, where I was standing in the lounge room out on the farm and asking dad "What’s that smell? I love that smell its gorgeous dad", he turned to me and said "Its Norsca deodorant" I was so in love with that smell. I use to watch the TV ads about it and asked dad where abouts the scenery was, he replied "Scandinavia". At that moment I told dad "I’m going to go to the land of Norsca in Scandinavia". Just that smell and looking at the scenery had captured an eight year old.

Exactly 20 years later, I visited the LAND OF NORSCA, SCANDINAVIA!

When I was nine I learnt dad was Polish and he had so many geography books on the world and I would sit for hours with dad while he showed me the world where places where and especially where he was born in Biala-Beilsko Poland. Dad told me there and there to me "Jecca, you will see where I was born one day".

Exactly 19 years later, I visited POLAND, BIALA-BEILSKO.

I was about to return back to Australia in 1998 after living in England for two years and I was wondering what I was going to do when I got back to Yamba. I had been out of the country all together for 5 years. I decided I wanted to travel around Australia, see my own country. Even at the time I had no idea how I was going to do this as I had NO money to my name, no car, nothing! I arrived back in Yamba in November 1998. In December I told mum that I was going to catch a bus to Cairns and find accommodation and live there for a bit, and at that time I met my boyfriend to be who said "I'll come"! I have a 4-wheel drive and we can drive up and from there go around Australia!

It happened, I got to TRAVEL AROUND AUSTRALIA CAMPING AND FISHING and seeing our beautiful country.

I also knew at a young age that I was never ever going to marry or end up with and Australian man in my life, he was always going to be from another country.

I am now with PAUL WHO IS FROM NEWZEALAND.

I never wanted to own a house with steps to it, in it or around it. I wanted a family in a house with no steps.

I now live in a house with NO STEPS.

It's only now that I fully understand that its obvious that we do create or manifest our destiny.